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‘Maintaining your sense of purpose’ through hardship

While juggling two young children and a new business, this principal lawyer experienced a house fire – and more than a year later, she has learnt a lot about resilience and being open and honest about her struggles.

user iconLauren Croft 01 February 2024 Big Law
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Renee Roumanos is the principal of Renee Roumanos Legal, based in south-west Sydney. Speaking recently on The Boutique Lawyer Show, she discussed rebuilding – her personal life and business life – after going through hardship and trauma while owning a new business.

After moving into her “dream home” in May 2022, Ms Roumanos started her legal practice six months later – and then, in November of that year, experienced a devastating house fire, losing most of her belongings and physical files. After reaching out to the legal community for help, she then began to “reset expectations” with her clients.

“I was very open about what had happened. I didn’t hide and not answer calls for a month. I put a very clear out-of-office message on, I put it on my socials, I put it out there and said, ‘hey, this really big scary life thing just happened to me. Just bear with me, give me some time,’” she said.

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“And I’m so grateful that my clients gave me the respect and the patience that I needed at the time. And most of those clients I had a year ago are still my clients now.”

Going through such a massive trauma allowed Ms Roumanos to learn both personal and professional lessons – and she said that being open and transparent was key.

“In my circumstance, it was one of those times where being open and honest allowed people to really connect with me and build real relationships and understand the real me. It also helped me as a person grow and become more empathetic. And I think empathy is a really big quality that all us lawyers must possess because we are carrying someone else’s burden, we’re carrying someone else’s stress,” she explained.

“However, I think from my own experiences, it’s really opened up my own mind to compassion, empathy, kindness, treating people the way you want to be treated, showing them that extra level of respect. In my own practice, I completely acknowledge what people need. They need someone to be honest with them, they need someone to be transparent, they need someone to tell them how it is. I’m very upfront with my legal advice, and I just feel like giving legal advice without the jargon, giving it with no fluffy business is my version of [the best].”

In addition, Ms Roumanos was able to develop increased resilience and find healthy ways to cope with what was going on in her personal life.

“Resilience is not about avoiding stress or avoiding difficult situations but rather developing the strength and the skill to navigate through it. And I call it resilience and being strong. But really, it was understanding my emotions at the time, understanding what was in my control, what was not in my control, trying to stay calm under all the pressure, finding a constructive way to cope with all the stress. And I had great biceps at the time because that’s what boxing did,” she added.

“But I think it was just about changing the outlook on the situation. We faced some really ugly challenges, and those experiences were ones I hope no one ever has to live through because they’re really tough. We had the bank telling us at one stage, ‘sorry, but you won’t get your insurance money because we’re putting it on the mortgage.’ And any normal layperson would have no idea what to do with that piece of information. Luckily, I had some skill up my sleeve and was able to deal with and adapt to that particular circumstance.”

To deal with these challenges around insurance, banking and rebuilding (both personally and professionally), Ms Roumanos found that having good coping mechanisms in place helped her continue to succeed.

“I think it’s all about your self-care, learning from your setbacks, maintaining your sense of purpose, and coping through the tough times to get you through to the other time, the good times. And there’s always going to be some good at the end of the ugly journey. And life is a bit of a roller coaster, and every one of us will have a difficult time in that process,” she concluded.

“But I think it’s finding yourself healthy coping mechanisms, seeking help when you need it, finding hobbies to get you through, and adopting anything that can sort of keep you level-headed, understanding that setbacks are actually opportunities and every setback has the other side of it – which is something we all have to sort of hold on to because, yes, we all go through setbacks, but they teach us how strong we are, and they teach us how far we can get after the setback.”

The transcript of this podcast episode was slightly edited for publishing purposes. To listen to the full conversation with Renee Roumanos, click below:

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