Courtroom Quotes

By Lawyers Weekly|03 March 2012

Today we take a look at some of the best vignettes judicial exchanges have to offer. They are taken from a book called Disorder in Court, the publishers of which we respectfully submit should be…

Today we take a look at some of the best vignettes judicial exchanges have to offer. They are taken from a book called Disorder in Court, the publishers of which we respectfully submit should be sued for stealing our idea.

If anyone knows where to find a good lawyer, we would appreciate you letting us know.

Q: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?

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A: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.

Q: Can you describe the individual?

A: He was about medium height and had a beard.

Q: Was this a male, or a female?

Q: All your responses must be oral, OK? What school did you go to?

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A: Oral.

Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?

A: No.

Q: Did you check for blood pressure?

A: No.

Q: Did you check for breathing?

A: No

Q: So, then, it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?

A: No.

Q: How can you be so sure, doctor?

A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.

Q: But could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?

A: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practising law somewhere.

Courtroom Quotes
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