“Morning person” wanted

By Reporter|20 March 2012

For those of you thinking of making a move in-house or launching a career overseas, there’s a company in the US looking for an in-house lawyer.

For those of you thinking of making a move in-house or launching a career overseas, there’s a company in the US looking for an in-house lawyer.

But before you jump online and apply, make sure you’re a “morning person”, and be certain that you’ll pass a drug and alcohol screening as well as a background check.

As Rollonfriday and Above the Law report, a long and very descriptive job ad has been posted by a company in Denver, Colorado on Craigslist this month, containing a number of entertaining specifications.

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In addition to ruling out any “mean” applicants that may be “hateful” or “spiteful” to staff, the job ad also says that while “being athletic” is not required, it “will most certainly make the top of the resume pile”. Oh, and the applicant must not ever be “hungover”, which makes Folklaw wonder how many Australian lawyers this would rule out.

Specifically, the ad goes on to say: “Heavy drinkers will not be tolerated, nor will drug addicts. We are all clean and sober in this company, and seeking someone who fits into this social class.

We are not passing judgment on those who enjoy an unhibited [sic] lifestyle. We just are not looking for that type of attorney at this time.”
At least they’re honest.

The ad also requests an applicant with “tact, skill, grace and more importantly humor”, asking for someone who cares about clients and “does not yell or act disgruntled” when a client calls. Again, Folklaw thinks the company may have ruled out a few more lawyers with this requirement.

“Rather, someone humane that understands the clients are truly hurt and sad, and worried and emotional. We need someone with the heart for this. Again, hangovers will not be tolerated.”

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So, if you dislike drinking as much as this company does, and you think you have what it takes to meet all these expectations, go ahead and apply here: http://denver.craigslist.org/lgl/2896882058.html

 

“Morning person” wanted
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