find the latest legal job
Corporate/Commercial Lawyers (2-5 years PAE)
Category: Corporate and Commercial Law | Location: Adelaide SA 5000
· Specialist commercial law firm · Long-term career progression
View details
Graduate Lawyer / Up to 1.5 yr PAE Lawyer
Category: Personal Injury Law | Location: Brisbane CBD & Inner Suburbs Brisbane QLD
· Mentoring Opportunity in Regional QLD · Personal Injury Law
View details
Corporate and Commercial Partner
Category: Corporate and Commercial Law | Location: Adelaide SA 5000
· Full time · Join a leading Adelaide commercial law firm
View details
In-house Legal Counsel & Commercial Lawyers
Category: Corporate and Commercial Law | Location: All Sydney NSW
· Providing lawyers with flexibility and control over when they work, how they work and who they work for.
View details
In-house Legal Counsel & Commercial Lawyers
Category: Corporate and Commercial Law | Location: All Melbourne VIC
· Providing lawyers with flexibility and control over when they work, how they work and who they work for.
View details
What do you call a lawyer with a joke book?

What do you call a lawyer with a joke book?

clown joke

While lawyers are used to advocating for clients, most grit their teeth and take it when it comes to lawyer jokes – but not Malcolm Kushner.

The former attorney turned humour consultant has come to lawyers’ defence, penning a book of comebacks to the most common lawyer jokes.

According to Mr Kushner, lawyer jokes have been around for centuries but reached a peak of both frequency and hostility in the 1980s. While ebbing and flowing in popularity over the next 30 years, they remain a staple for the jokester with a grudge against the profession (or a high legal bill).

Today, lawyers are subjected to thousands of variations, from the mildly hurtful (Why don't snakes bite attorneys? Professional courtesy) to the downright cruel (What do you do when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in wet cement? Buy more cement).

With his new book, Comebacks for Lawyer Jokes: The Restatement of Retorts, Mr Kushner hopes to give lawyers some punchlines of their own.

He suggests lawyers can parry these attempts at humour by providing their own, more positive spin.

As an example, if an odious dinner party guest opens with “what do you call 500 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?” Mr Kushner suggests jumping in with “The Bar Association of Atlantis" – upstaging the joke teller before they can say "a good start".

Alternatively, Mr Kushner also recommends lawyer jokes showing the profession in a good light – for example, highlighting their service to the community with: "What's the definition of an optimist? A public interest lawyer with a mortgage." 

Folklaw applauds Mr Kushner for trying to restore dignity to the profession, but also thanks him for introducing this joke to the world:

Q: How many lawyer jokes are there?
A: Hundreds – but they're all sitting in parliament.

 Like this story? Subscribe to our free newsletter and receive Lawyers Weekly every day straight to your inbox.

Like this story? Read more:

QLS condemns actions of disgraced lawyer as ‘stain on the profession’

NSW proposes big justice reforms to target risk of reoffending

The legal budget breakdown 2017

What do you call a lawyer with a joke book?
lawyersweekly logo
Promoted content
Recommended by Spike Native Network
more from lawyers weekly
06:04
Young humanitarian lawyer California-bound
A young Australian lawyer will be travelling to the US next year for a prestigious nine-month study ...
Jackie Rhodes
Dec 12 2017
Report sheds light on LGBTQI inclusion in law firms
A recent report has revealed the varying perceptions on LGBTQI diversity and inclusion in the Austra...
Women in business
Dec 12 2017
Annabel Crabb headlines Women in Business Forum
Political journalist Annabel Crabb has appeared at the Coleman Greig Lawyers Women in Business Forum...
APPOINTMENTS
Allens managing partner Richard Spurio, image courtesy Allens' website
Jun 21 2017
Promo season at Allens
A group of lawyers at Allens have received promotions across its PNG and Australian offices. ...
May 11 2017
Partner exits for in-house role
A Victorian lawyer has left the partnership of a national firm to start a new gig with state governm...
Esteban Gomez
May 11 2017
National firm recruits ‘major asset’
A national law firm has announced it has appointed a new corporate partner who brings over 15 years'...
opinion
Nicole Rich
May 16 2017
Access to justice for young transgender Australians
Reform is looming for the process that young transgender Australians and their families must current...
Geoff Roberson
May 11 2017
The lighter side of the law: when law and comedy collide
On the face of it, there doesn’t seem to be much that is amusing about the law, writes Geoff Rober...
Help
May 10 2017
Advocate’s immunity – without fear or without favour but not both
On 29 March 2017, the High Court handed down its decision in David Kendirjian v Eugene Lepore & ...