“I simply wasn’t happy that the stress and anxiety had become so deeply entrenched. I was existing on a different wavelength to everybody else,” he reflected. 

In the same episode, Mr Doraisamy reflected on who bears responsibility for the health and wellbeing of individual lawyers. 

After seeing a psychologist and starting antidepressant medication, Mr Doraisamy was initially grateful for his proactive attitude in “ticking boxes” to getting better. 

In hindsight, he came to the realisation that as a soon-to-be law graduate: “I was very much a subscriber to certain personality traits, which we all know are deleterious to the holistic health and wellbeing of legal professionals.”

Perfectionism and competitiveness were the traits the editor emphasised. Mr Doraisamy identified that it were these qualities he was exhibiting that ultimately contributed to his breakdown. 

He explained: “I mistakenly assumed that those same traits could help me get out of that hole. I felt that if I was really diligent, really motivated to tick the boxes, then everything would be okay again.

“I was competitive with myself, being a perfectionist about making sure that I was doing the right things, but I didn’t appreciate that those traits were the problem in the first place.”

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Mr Doraisamy recognised that he had to relinquish these habits rather than using them as “strengths” in order to get better. 

Other professionals in the legal field have explored how these qualities can be used for the better, such as how collaboration can overcome toxic competitiveness and the ways to manage perfectionism. 

What should have been two of the most exciting days of his life, with both university graduation and his admission to the Supreme Court of NSW around the corner, instead became days that he “was almost entirely incapable of gleaning any joy or satisfaction from”. 

Now a decade on from this period of his life, the Lawyers Weekly editor ruminated about the current state of lawyers’ wellbeing in Australia.

“I think we’re absolutely headed in the right direction compared to where we were, say 15 [to] 20 years ago,” he commented, whilst noting the significant advances in raising awareness towards the prevalence of mental disorders. 

Additionally, Mr Doraisamy warned of new issues exacerbated by pandemic lockdowns and the consequences of coronavirus. 

Though hybrid work models are demonstrating a “myriad of benefits” for lawyers, loneliness is becoming a new normal for many individuals. 

“If more and more lawyers are working remotely and flexibly, if they go an entire day without speaking to a single person, it will have deleterious consequences for the holistic wellbeing of legal professionals,” he said.

Due to lawyers’ statistically proven predispositions towards competitiveness, perfectionism and pessimism, Mr Doraisamy stressed the importance of social interaction and sense of community. 

Taking the right steps towards maintaining mental wellbeing, such as joining a gym or utilising meditation in everyday life, enables lawyers to maintain their health as a key priority. 

“I think that in the coming years, we’re going to see a real increase in the number of lawyers who are experiencing anxiety and depression by virtue of that social isolation.”

Mr Doraisamy encouraged legal professionals to keep a close eye on their colleagues and promoted a proactive approach in seeking solutions that alleviate social isolation.

Help is available via Lifeline on 13 11 14 and Beyond Blue at 1300 22 4636. Each law society and bar association also has further contacts available on their respective websites.

The transcript of this podcast episode was slightly edited for publishing purposes. To listen to the full conversation with Jerome Doraisamy and Codie Asimus, click below: